The love that is peculiar to marriage must be Eros – romantic love.
This is essential. If a
couple aren’t in love, they are living a lie.
The marriage service talks about loving and cherishing.
The Bible makes clear in its opening passages that man would leave his
mother and father and be united with his wife as ‘one flesh’.
Without a degree of romantic attraction, this would be impossible.
However, romance can die out. The attraction of getting to know someone new, the first
kiss, the butterflies in the stomach – this all goes.
With the practicalities of married life, there is often little time for
romance. Eventually, the romance
becomes something else as you get older. At
times, sex won’t work at all for any number of reasons.
This can include sickness, impotence etc.
If this was all there was to marriage, you’d be in trouble.
Genesis gives the real reason Eve was created – Adam was lonely and
needed companionship. Friendship
– being able to talk, have fun, do things together - is essential for a
marriage to work.